Onesday, Tuesday...

Tuesday March 28

LEFTY

REDNECK

STUPID

Here's hopin' you're copin' with another workday. Here's a little bit of humor to take the WE out of WEEK!

* When I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he's thorough.
* When I don't do it, I'm lazy. When my boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.
* When I do something without being told, I'm trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that's initiative.
* When I please the boss, I'm sucking up. When my boss pleases his boss, that's being proactive.
* When I do good, my boss never remembers. When I do bad, my boss never forgets.

A new teacher was trying to make use of her child psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "If you think you're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid?" Little Johnny replied, "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself!"

Guys, have you ever fallen victim to one of these zingers???

Man: Haven't I seen you some place before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and mine will be, too, if you sit down.

Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do Not Enter.

Man: Can I buy you a drink?
Woman, Actually, I'd rather have the money.

Man: How did you get to be so beautiful?
Woman: I must have been given your share.

Man: Your face must turn a few heads.
Woman: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

Man: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
Woman: Okay, GET OUT!

Man: I think I could make you very happy.
Woman: Why, are you leaving?

Man: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Woman: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh hysterically at the same time.

Man: Can I have your name?
Woman: Why, don't you already have one?

Man: Why don't we go to see a movie.
Woman: No thanks, I've already seen one.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

That's it for today! Hang in there!! You can do it!!